Honeymoon's Over

I just got into trouble for not cooking correctly. He's gone for a drive, and now I'm angry. Who would have thought that a recipe on the back of a can of beans could trigger an outburst like that. I thought I was being helpful by cooking dinner.

Today, it rained and the sun barely came out. I guess that means the peace in our PTSD Warzone has ended. It's time for me to step back and take a breath. Lord, we go through this numerous times each month. It's nothing new to be yelled at and belittled, but it hurts so much. All of this head knowledge means nothing because it does little to stop the hurt from unkind words.

Sunshine and Anxiety

The sunshine has been so good for my husband. He feels better, his mood is better and the outbursts have become less frequent. I can't get used to this because I know the winter rains are coming. I still find myself walking on eggshells because I can't be certain that something I say or do won't be a trigger.

My husband has been anxious at night and truly has his days and nights mixed up. It's difficult for me--I can only imagine the havoc this confusion is wreaking on his body! He sleeps much of the time, but when he is awake--he seems good.

For now, I purpose to enjoy this season of relative quiet in our PTSD Warzone.

Blessings,
The PTSD Widow